Monday, October 11, 2010

Take Two Granddaughters and Call Me in the Morning....

I haven't been posting because I've been in a deep funk....life continues to throw me curve balls....and I've let a few of them hit me in the head!  I am certain that there are so many lessons and messages that I need to learn and to hear...my doctor has changed my medication, which will result in my having a few weird days until I adjust to it. but then I expect that I will view the playing field as leveled out once again...I'm looking forward to being better able to roll with the punches....still no jobs in sight...in the field of education or anything else, for that matter...I had taken the training course required to become a literacy tutor for the public library system.....got my first student two weeks ago....and he has not returned my telephone calls...I'm beginning to be able to laugh about how all of the doors that lead to me being able to teaach...following my dream by quitting my job and going to school full time....are just not opening for me...no takers in Korea...no takers in the California educational system for any internship positions, or any position for that matter....I've recently discovered a blog new to me-Happy, Joyous and Free...she is dealing with some similar issues, and I am drawing on the strength and wisdom of her sharing...in particular, her comment on "faith it til you make it" resonated within me....so I am taking baby steps, working myself out of a pit of anxiety and despair, and believing that the answers will come when I am ready for them.  In the meantime, I had the joy of taking care of my two granddaughters in San Diego for a few days last week while my daughter attended a conference...exhausting, yes, but totally fulfilling...it felt good to have a sense of purpose!  One step, one day at a time, I believe that this season of my life will pass, and that the experience will have enriched me and helped me to grow in ways that right now I am blind to.  I just hope that this season ends soon!  ox